Money Doesn’t Buy [Much] Happiness

If you’ve been reading my blog since day 1, you came along stretches of time when I was completely and utterly depressed. I blogged a lot about it, most of which I switched to private, eventually, and others gave different categories that I cannot find now.

The latter part of my previous job had me work in a basement under dreadful conditions. It is there where I believe I contacted whatever it is causing me the eyelash infection as well when I have experienced the very lows of what it means to have everything you can buy and not much else.

I used the money to get a car and slowly over the years make my dream apartment. From living in a studio with very basic furniture to a nice big place my friends would often think is for a married couple (I give credit to my sis for her amazing taste in decoration). I bought everything I would want, had the most exquisite dinners, and lived the “Dubai” that is promoted on TV (well I didn’t have a massage yet, so be kind and give me a voucher!).

However my life was miserable. I had very little friends – most of which left to work or live abroad. The ones who remained have their own lifestyles and social bubbles I cannot always accommodate (and, of course, as it is, people don’t adapt to you but expect you to adapt to them). I didn’t particularly like the type of work I was doing and started enrolling in artistic courses to make myself feel better.

Then I distinctly remember one day, me sitting down there and thinking:

“I wish in a couple of years time I am done with this… that I live life as I want to live it… even if it means living on the edge, financially, and barely making ends meet. I want to experience the thrill of that little pay-check that would make me afford something. I want to do all the things I wanted and freelance and be busy all day but LOVE being busy. I want to be in the creative world, live simply, humbly, remove all these materialistic things that don’t make any sense. I want to feel true happiness. I want to smile from the inside, for once.”

Soon after that I was made redundant, went through another wave of depression. I joined twitter. I have made and met so many amazing friends and amazing people. I am juggling jobs and just barely making ends meet. My monetary resources dropped two digits and I will probably have to break my promise to myself and ask my parents for help (I made a promise never to take money from my parents again).

It is very stressful, especially seeing my other friends rising in their companies, going on with their lives. That’s fine. It is my choice. I wanted to be like this. And here I am. Do I regret it? No. Would I go back? Never. Can this be better? It sure is… I am still exploring. An extra income wouldn’t hurt of course. Though I may be living part of my dream I also must consider the reality of things.

I have never, ever, felt so incredibly happy – even when I am very upset, or stressed, and when I feel there are challenges and obstacles… I feel the drive to overcome them. Because I know this is what I asked for and that it makes me happy.

I am 26, still young. I don’t have a career. I probably can’t afford getting married any time soon (sorry mom), heck I don’t know if I can afford next month.

But I am not defining myself by title, money, company position, marital status, car, income, or the probability that I have denial.

I’m Kinan. Period.

OMG! My Virtual House Costs $1 Million on E-Bay!

If you’re a fan of videogames or odd news in general, you probably heard about the teacher in the US who became a millionaire by playing the online game Second Life.

Let me brief you in on what the game is all about.

Just like the title says, Second Life. You literally live a second life. You go online and create your virtual character, and you are thrown off with millions of other users into the virtual world. What’s the catch? Because it is your virtual adaptation of the life you dream of, you also use your real money to make any transactions.

Yup, you heard that right. You use real money from your real bank account to buy a house, clothes, items, furniture, pets, jets and anything you want in the FUCKING VIRTUAL WORLD. Why? Simply because YOU CAN’T DO THAT IN REAL LIFE.

I mean that is just genius.

Say you CAN afford a private jet, but you very unfortunately live in the middle of the ocean where all you can have is private boats. But you want a private jet! So online you go, and you purchase a VIRTUAL PRIVATE JET with your REAL MONEY so that your VIRTUAL CHARACTER can enjoy his or her time in that private jet.

I mean, how sad is this really? You are so deprived of everything in life that you actually raise your virtual character and give it everything you couldn’t have for yourself. If you’re a parent this may sound familiar, but at least you’re giving it to your real kids in the real life. In Second Life you literally spend as many dollars as you can afford on your virtual character which can be switched off by the press of the power button.

What are people thinking? You can’t go to school, so you go to a private school in Second Life for a good amount of money. Worse yet, the teacher in the virtual school can literally be anyone who is “qualified” enough by the game’s standards. I mean this is seriously pathetic. As if we are so comfortable in managing our own real lives and expenses, we still have to manage a second one.

You can probably guess that this game was created by people who have recently escaped a mental institute and have formed a camp in the sewers.

So anyway, back to this millionaire teacher, apparently she is smart enough to abuse the idiots online and what she did was trade in real estate. I mean you virtual character HAS to live somewhere right? She bought herself a nice little place and sold it for higher price, then got a bigger one and sold it with profit, etc, until she actually established her own virtual real estate agency and started cashing in.

Welcome to the new era of bankruptcy and theft.