Moogle Thoughts Issue #8 – The Infidel and the Dermatologist

Finally! It’s here!

But… wait! Where is it?!

Well before I give it to you:

What you’re about to see is a mockup. In otherwords, all the content, is by ME. So yes, I get to butcher lots of people here :P But it’s dedicated to our one and only HANI.

Remember! The “chatbox” is to be read bottoms-up!

Remember! It was written with LOVE! Nothing to be offended about!

So go ahead and ENJOY! >>>>>>>> CLICK HERE!

And don’t forget to comment on this post :P

Car Dealers: Assholes with a License

It is funny how life works (funny to the point of sadness). Case in point: Yesterday it just dawned on me that my 2007 Pajero oddly looks like the 2006 Pajero, although it drives differently. I should have known that a 3.8 and a 3.0 are two different engines to begin with.

Anyway, I dug in some images from the net for the 2007 model, and, to my surprise, it looks different. I thought to myself that maybe this was the European model (it DID say Paris) and anyone who saw the European and Asian Altima will know what I am talking about.

Just out of curiosity I called up my friend and gave him the number of the car dealer I dealth with for my car. I know that I asked the guy for the availability of the 2007 models and he said it is available, and all the paperwork was done on the 2007 Pajero.

So I had the 2007 Pajero right? I mean even the car owner license (the milkiyyah if you’re Arabic and didn’t get what I am saying) had 2007 on it.

So my friend calls up the dealer and tells him “listen, the cars in your showroom are different than the ones I saw on the net. So are those the Asian 2007 models or do you still have the 2006 models?”

“These are the 2006 models. The 2007 models are coming next month”

So yes, I have been fooled – it turned out that the 2007 on the paperwork and the car is that the car was manufactured in 2007 but it isn’t the 2007 model. I have the 2006 model. Only made in 2007.

Car dealer job description: Be an asshole. Just sell the fucking car.

REPENT YOU FILTH!

You know something? You are always getting bullshitted from work, from friends, from family. Your parents never approve of what you are doing or what you have become. Your boss thinks he is Mr. Wise Ass when he’s nothing but a plank of wood. Your friends sharpen their pitchforks to impale you with it when you turn your back. Life just doesn’t use a condom anymore.

Then when you try to seek solace on Friday prayers (or Sunday mass if you’re Christian), the priest/sheikh instead of giving you hope and a purpose in life, they bash at you at how worthless you are, insignificant and so horribly wrong that literally not even God can save you anymore as you are so beyond repair.

I mean seriously, what’s wrong with priests and sheikhs these days? Masses are supposed to give people hope and purpose and solve their common problems, and educate them more about life and their religion. Now every mass is simply an audio tape of how a low life you have become and how God has just abandoned you and your pathetic life and useless existence.

And then they expect us not to go blow ourselves up or murder or fuck or do drugs.

Get a life people, seriously, and revise how you give your masses. You’re making people run away from God.

Operation Black Beetle

Well actually they’re not always black. In fact the majority are brownish. I don’t know why black is cooler though.

Anyway, so I have had this big roach invasion when I first moved in. I then realized I was the one who invaded as they were already beyond settled in the studio and have already colonized into tribes. I was greeted by the official runner from one of the tribes but, unfortunately, he never made it back.

Enraged at the loss of their runner, the leader of one of the tribes met the other leader in a summit beneath the kitchen. “We are to poop on the food and spread our germs and eggs where we can,” says one of the elders. “Soldiers, inseminate your women, we go commando.”

And so it happened. Impregnated female roaches infested the kitchen while the kamikaze soldiers raided the counter top.

After a month of battling, and many lost lives, I called in the exterminator. Apparently they have new technology now, and instead of spraying they just bait the roach with poison, and when it goes back to the nest it kills everyone there.

It didn’t work, and, in fact, for a while it decreased. Then winter came, and the reign of the roaches is over. Defeated, they migrated to another place. I emerged victorious.

Little did I know they went to regroup and call on friends.

The came back, recently, in large numbers. Sending their children to raid the kitchen and having an all out war against me.

I have had it with them. I mass massacred families of roaches in a mere few days. I want to go to the kitchen for once without being terrified.

I called on the official exterminator, my friend. He came, and, for 4.5 hours, we obliterated all tribes. Vacuumed, scrubbed, and cleaned with lots of Ariel and Clorox…. lots and lots of Clorox… and then naphthalene and silicon.

Unfortunately, there was one survivor. A most dangerous one. A mother. She escaped, last sighted scurrying to the bathroom.

The bathroom was cleaned and sealed up with silicon. But she survived.

Till this morning.

Hopefully I won’t be seeing any of them anytime soon, except a couple of survivors, if they manage not to suffocate in the silicon and naphthalene.

Mission Accomplished

Total Oblivion

As a lot of you know, the infinitely stupid Etisalat has blocked deviantART and myself, along with a million other UAE members, are upset at the stupidity the ISP has reached. While it is completely accessible from work (since it is free zone area), not being able to browse from home renders the weekend useless :P

Anyway that stupidity aside, now that I finally got a new desktop I got to install the wonderful game of Oblivion. It is probably has the best graphics for a PC game to date (although this is about to change now that the next-gen graphics cards and games are out), and a mere look at the screenshot below would speak for itself. Try to imagine this world in motion, with rain and snow and hail even! Good grief. It plays realistically as well – you can’t pick up just any item you see or it will be considered theft. You WILL be jailed and pay a fine, and if you resist you gotta fight the guards and stuff. It is unbelievable and big since the whole thing is just open to you to explore from the get-go.

Those aside, my visa is finally out, so I would probably be trying to get my hands on this

Pray for me :D