Reflections: Why Did I Kill My Sister?
Disclaimer for the confused: this is a work of fiction. I didn’t kill anyone.
I did not believe it at first when I heard the tip from someone.
I was in the cafe with my friends, playing cards and smoking hooka, like we always do on a nice spring day with light showers outside, and a cool breeze gently ruffling our hair, and lifting the foreigner’s skirt across the cafe, teasing us with the sight of two gorgeous legs. My throat dried as my mind thought of nothing but what’s underneath the skirt.
She stood up, speaking on the phone and laughing, and she went downstairs, or probably some place in the back where there is little noise.
“I need to take a piss,” I told my friends. “And I am taking the cards with me!”
The bastards always looked at my cards on a leak break.
I scouted for her. I can’t be seen over hovering at the ladies’ loo. “3eib” I told myself, “ma biseer”. I went in to take a leak – true to my words – and left and went to the first floor. Ah, she was there, just outside. Hmm. Too many people around. Just perfect.
I walked up to her when she just finished her phone call, blocking her way.
“Oops, sorry, excuse me,” I said, with a wink in my eye and a smile. She understood. She went back up. I pretended to make a phone call and went back up again.
She stole some looks, I could see from the corner of my eye. She’s probably a bit too embarrassed to talk to me. Hmm… is that her friend? Damn! Holy crap! Those are definitely fake!
There must be a way to talk to her.
I got a phone call.
“Yes?!”
“My friend’s friend saw your sister talk with some guy a block from your place!”
“WHAT!”
I couldn’t believe it. My blood was boiling. I left.
I drove to my house. I called up my dad on the way, and told him what my friend told me. He said I should come home quick.
We beat the crap out of her. Locked her in for days, and we beat her more. That little bitch kept swearing the guy was giving her her friend’s book from school. It’s her friend’s cousin she claimed. That whore!
I go to the grocery store to buy some stuff. Crap. How am I to show my face to the salesman? What is he gonna say? “You can’t even put a leash on the women at your household? How do you call yourself a man?! Looks like your family is nas faltaneh“.
I couldn’t take it any more. My family’s honor is at stake. My honor is at stake. My public image. My ego. MY… MY… MY… MY… MY…
The prison was cold. A couple of the other inmates were cheering my decision. “Good riddance… we don’t need more whores around… you did a good job.” Another guy said “women should never leave their homes. They’re never good at whatever they do outside… and when they go outside they fuck up everything.”
I wasn’t so sure. Anymore. Of what I did. Was it right, or wrong?
What happened to my family honor now? The daughter dead, the son in jail? What happened to my image… am I a hero now? Or a guy from prison? When I get released… will I marry? Who will marry me? A monster who kills women?
I should have checked if the guy was her friend’s relative. I should have checked it was all about homework.
My ego… shit… I feel like a little piece of fuck. My dreams confined in this cell here with me. No one will listen, no one will hear, not a person will remember I existed. Just another guy who killed another girl, to save an honor that got butchered because he tried to “save” it.
And now my mom is all alone, doing the cooking and the cleaning. She doesn’t visit me. She cries every day I am sure.
I remembered that hot girl in the cafe.
Will mom forgive me? All those memories, all 18 years of them, I decided to take away.
I wanted to get married in a couple of years.
That girl in the cafe… I wanted to marry her.
Did her brother kill her too?
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Excellent! Hard hitting. Really…this is a perspective you don’t often see. Thank you.
Wow, KJ, well said from the other side. Thank you so much for the investment of time and energy you gave this post. Thank you for affirming the lives of women.
Excellent post, amazing narration of events.
KJ this is a great post. You were always a good writer, but in my humble opinion, this is your very best yet. PASSION! I love it.
Besides writing and reading about a just and noble cause is so rewarding.
Man, this is too sad
This is one great post man. Heart touching
Wow, that was one of the best reads I had in a while. Thank you for taking the time to talk about this critical issue. We definitely need to raise awareness.
hmm you should check our blog, we had a very similar post written a few days ago
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Reading this left me speechless…
You really hit the nail on the head. Great post.
[...] but not the least, another Syrian blogger, Kinan Jarjous, wrote a touching short story called “Why Did I Kill My Sister?” in which he has indeed [...]
Great stuff KJ. Unfortunately, your character would be out of jail in no time at all.
great rendering of this social plague in an imaginative, artistic form that reflects an honorable moral lesson!
But still, i’m too cynical to sympathize with your character who will allow the whole “honor cleansing” purpose triumph any complex psychological dilemmas he is feeling at the moment. After all, and unfortunately, won’t he be released in no time to a society/community that will celebrate his reclaiming of his so-called-honor, and even perhaps as a result will award him with a7la banat el7ara– or i mean “ashraf” banat el7ara…? This is the reality, sadly.
Great post Kinan
….
Excuse me for saying that, but I can’t find the words that describe the atrocity and hideousness of this post. I don’t think it was your best post at all. this one was narrated similar to an old post written by a fellow blogger that we both criticized.
You know who I am talking about.
Listen man, this guy is getting a rehab and he’s getting outta jail to bang that foreigner chick. And you’re gonna write about it in details in your next post. I don’t see that soon, we’re never friends and we’ve never met, okay?!!
On a serious note though, this was an excellent read. Thanks for saying it right, KJ.
I applaud you for your intentions here and I don’t mean to be critical but I have to say it- I don’t think this issue is that simplistic. Also, I agree with secratea here.
My favorite part is the last 2 sentences. I think that made the most powerful point.
Isobel -
My pleasure
Kinzi -
It’s our duty to bring awareness. This act has got to stop, or at least, be reduced.
Razan -
Thank you Razan
abufares -
I am humbled by your words as always
Jerusalem -
The story is fictional, but honor killing should stop
Ulysses -
Thank you my friend
Hala -
You’re more than welcome – we all should.
Yameen -
Will do
Gabriela -
We should raise awareness
Sarah -
Thank you Sarah. I do feel that it is significantly lacking. No amount of writing is enough to be honest.
Rime -
Awareness has to be raised. It is a gradual thing, and not overnight of course, but people should begin to notice that this is wrong. I doubt that any person didn’t rethink what they did at one point, even briefly.
secretea -
You’re correct, but I am not addressing that part here. I am drawing the paradox of a guy who is investing effort in talking to another girl, which he sees OK, but doesn’t see it OK when his sister is being talked to. It’s the basic man mentality of “I do what I want but you can’t touch my sister”, and the whole issue of “well you’re talking to someone else’s sister”. I am sure many people do rethink their actions but then the overwhelming support defeats the purpose.
vagueraz -
Thank you
Hamza -
I am typing this response just to reassure you I don’t ignore stupid comments
DJ -
LOOOOL, man, just say outright you want me to write erotica!
asoom -
I completely understand. Of course, it’s oversimplified, but no amount of writing can do this justice. The last two sentences pretty much were the point of the whole post – the paradox of wanting to talk to a girl (who might be someone’s sister) but killing off a guy who talks to your own sister
A great Post KJ really I loved how you touched the double standards we live how its okie if we did something and not okie if someone else did it not to mention if it is someone we have authority over.. Loved it
Loved your post man very heartfelt
Wow this is a great piece! Very well written, it definately makes one think!
Honour crimes is a bog thing here and many have been fighting it for years. One Christian girl I knew in University was killed by her brother because she was in love with a muslim, and that was pure love with no hnour involved. KJ, I liked your post, very good one indeed. whats with the rain lately in Dubai?
I demand Moogle Thoughts NOW!!!!
I second kinano, we want moogle!
oh and who were u and hamza criticizing?!
[...] becoming more intertwined as we saw posted by Syrian bloggers on the issue (Abufares, razan and KJ pitched in) For starters many of the posts, emails and messages made it to the jordan times and [...]
it felt so real …. very good written and i hope it makes a difference
[...] According to blogger Bam Bam, there has been little interaction between Jordanian and Syrian bloggers. But the recent campaign found support from Syrian bloggers as seen in posts written by Abu Fares, Razan, and last but not least KJ who wrote a fictional story entitled “why I killed my sister.” [...]
[...] ultimo ma non meno importante, KJ, il quale ha scritto un racconto immaginario intitolato “perché ho ucciso mia sorella ” [...]
[...] KJ [...]
“Disclaimer for the confused: this is a work of fiction. I didn’t kill anyone.”
HA! Great that you had to add that
[...] becoming more intertwined as we saw posts by Syrian bloggers on the issue (Abufares, razan and KJ pitched in) For starters many of the posts, emails and messages made it to the jordan times and [...]