Moogle Thoughts Issue #3 – On Sunroofs, Titanic, Dragons and iPods
Moogle: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
KJ: Keep your ears in the car.
Moogle: Kupo! I LOVE the sunroof it is amaaaaaaaaaazing!
KJ: It ISN’T a sunroof you uninitiated dope.
Moogle: Kupo you should get one like this for your car!
KJ: It is PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE without destroying it!
Moogle: Then how come your friend’s car isn’t destroyed? It is much smaller and it has this big sunroof. LOOK! All the way to the back.
KJ: IT ISN’T A GODDAMN SUNROOF YOU STUPID IDIOT IT IS A FRIGGING CONVERTABLE!
Moogle: A what?
KJ: A SPORTSCAR.
Moogle: Dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
KJ: Stop it Bart.
Moogle: Who is Bart.
KJ: ….
Moogle: Kupo why are you opening the door?
KJ: ….
Moogle: Kupo!
Moogle: Kupo, it has been 23 minutes and they are still discussing boats.
KJ: Yeah I know. I grew tired of nodding.
Moogle: Why don’t you tell them about the yachts you used to ride in KSA?
KJ: I am NOT opening doors for further dicussions.
Moogle: But kupo! Surely you had a great time on the yachts. Tell them.
KJ: No.
Moogle: You don’t want to slip and recall that Titanic fetish…
KJ: Shut up already.
Moogle: You remember it right? You used to stand with your MOM’S friend in front of the yacht and you’d stand behind her and hold out her hands like that Titanic scene.
KJ: Shut up! I am NOT going to make a scene out of this. I DO have a reputation!
Moogle: Uh-uh. You’re doing splendidly to maintain it. Emo.
KJ: You’re not helping it is ALL your fault.
Moogle: Kupo, come on admit it, she was your only hope of mating in KSA.
KJ: She was a spinster! She was mom’s friend! She should have kids my age!
Moogle: But kupo you like her hair against your face and the wind and the sunset.
KJ: You’re a disturbed and sick, perverted sexually frustrated Moogle.
Moogle: You ruined it for both of us.
KJ: Stupid bunny.
Moogle: I think dragons breathed fire
KJ: Dragons…
Moogle: Yes! They existed.
KJ: Of course sweety *pats Moogle*
Moogle: Kupo! Dragons are like dinosaurs
KJ: Dinos didn’t exist in modern England.
Moogle: Yes yes but they breathed fire anyway
KJ: You can’t breathe fire
Moogle: But kupo! Hear me out.
KJ: I have no other choice, do I?
Moogle: You can focus on traffic instead
KJ: It is the lesser of two evils
Moogle: Anyway Kupo, you know you can set your farts on fire right?
KJ: I am NOT going to have this conversation
Moogle: Listen! If you humans can breathe fire from your asses, why can’t dragons breathe fire too?!
KJ: No one farts from the mouth!
Moogle: But maybe they’re different Kupo! Maybe they can hold the gas inside and ignite it from the mouth
KJ: Enough, you disgust me
Moogle: But, but, but
KJ: Don’t let me ignite my farts on you now!
Moogle: I want that new iPod Nano
KJ: You already have an iPod
Moogle: Yes yes but we have the silver one
KJ: And…
Moogle: I want the pink one
KJ: PINK
Moogle: You’re not sexist are you?
KJ: PINK?!
Moogle: But kupo, pink is the new red!
KJ: They DISCOVERED pink by BLEACHING red
Moogle: Ok get me the red one.
KJ: RED?!?!
Moogle: What now? The rims of your spectacles are red!
KJ: They are SPECTACLES. Not an iPOD
Moogle: Kupo your logic is illogical.
KJ: Shut up, your silver iPod is fine.
Moogle: You are SO everything-challenged
KJ: I am NOT
Moogle: Yes
KJ: No
Moogle: Yes
KJ: Enough!
Moogle: But if they only release a pink Xbox you’d get it
KJ: *mumbles*
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KJ: Keep your ears in the car.
Moogle: Kupo! I LOVE the sunroof it is amaaaaaaaaaazing!
KJ: It ISN’T a sunroof you uninitiated dope.
Moogle: Kupo you should get one like this for your car!
KJ: It is PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE without destroying it!
Moogle: Then how come your friend’s car isn’t destroyed? It is much smaller and it has this big sunroof. LOOK! All the way to the back.
KJ: IT ISN’T A GODDAMN SUNROOF YOU STUPID IDIOT IT IS A FRIGGING CONVERTABLE!
Moogle: A what?
KJ: A SPORTSCAR.
Moogle: Dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
KJ: Stop it Bart.
Moogle: Who is Bart.
KJ: ….
Moogle: Kupo why are you opening the door?
KJ: ….
Moogle: Kupo!
Moogle: Kupo, it has been 23 minutes and they are still discussing boats.
KJ: Yeah I know. I grew tired of nodding.
Moogle: Why don’t you tell them about the yachts you used to ride in KSA?
KJ: I am NOT opening doors for further dicussions.
Moogle: But kupo! Surely you had a great time on the yachts. Tell them.
KJ: No.
Moogle: You don’t want to slip and recall that Titanic fetish…
KJ: Shut up already.
Moogle: You remember it right? You used to stand with your MOM’S friend in front of the yacht and you’d stand behind her and hold out her hands like that Titanic scene.
KJ: Shut up! I am NOT going to make a scene out of this. I DO have a reputation!
Moogle: Uh-uh. You’re doing splendidly to maintain it. Emo.
KJ: You’re not helping it is ALL your fault.
Moogle: Kupo, come on admit it, she was your only hope of mating in KSA.
KJ: She was a spinster! She was mom’s friend! She should have kids my age!
Moogle: But kupo you like her hair against your face and the wind and the sunset.
KJ: You’re a disturbed and sick, perverted sexually frustrated Moogle.
Moogle: You ruined it for both of us.
KJ: Stupid bunny.
Moogle: I think dragons breathed fire
KJ: Dragons…
Moogle: Yes! They existed.
KJ: Of course sweety *pats Moogle*
Moogle: Kupo! Dragons are like dinosaurs
KJ: Dinos didn’t exist in modern England.
Moogle: Yes yes but they breathed fire anyway
KJ: You can’t breathe fire
Moogle: But kupo! Hear me out.
KJ: I have no other choice, do I?
Moogle: You can focus on traffic instead
KJ: It is the lesser of two evils
Moogle: Anyway Kupo, you know you can set your farts on fire right?
KJ: I am NOT going to have this conversation
Moogle: Listen! If you humans can breathe fire from your asses, why can’t dragons breathe fire too?!
KJ: No one farts from the mouth!
Moogle: But maybe they’re different Kupo! Maybe they can hold the gas inside and ignite it from the mouth
KJ: Enough, you disgust me
Moogle: But, but, but
KJ: Don’t let me ignite my farts on you now!
Moogle: I want that new iPod Nano
KJ: You already have an iPod
Moogle: Yes yes but we have the silver one
KJ: And…
Moogle: I want the pink one
KJ: PINK
Moogle: You’re not sexist are you?
KJ: PINK?!
Moogle: But kupo, pink is the new red!
KJ: They DISCOVERED pink by BLEACHING red
Moogle: Ok get me the red one.
KJ: RED?!?!
Moogle: What now? The rims of your spectacles are red!
KJ: They are SPECTACLES. Not an iPOD
Moogle: Kupo your logic is illogical.
KJ: Shut up, your silver iPod is fine.
Moogle: You are SO everything-challenged
KJ: I am NOT
Moogle: Yes
KJ: No
Moogle: Yes
KJ: Enough!
Moogle: But if they only release a pink Xbox you’d get it
KJ: *mumbles*
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