Oddball of a World vol.3

Good Monday!

Who hates Mondays? We all do. Actually Sundays in this part of the world. But in any case, here is some absurd news that made headlines to cheer you up.

The Gods Have Accepted Your Sacrifice

So you own an airline company and one of your planes has always been jinxed, troubled beyond trouble and might get into the Wikipedia as one of those (if not the most) malfunctional pieces of equipment ever created by man. Yet you’d lose business if it doesn’t fly, and if it does fly you’d lose people. And you don’t have the money to fix it. What a pickle! So what do you do? Simple: Sacrifice two goats to please the sky gods and everything will be fine. Although you might be laughing now, it actually worked. Talk about supernatural powers of goats!

So We Fixed the Plane, Why the DELAY?

Assuming you have a proper plane, you get another problem on your hands: The passengers. No no, not those who arrive last minute, but the ones who want to shuffle seats. I mean, everyone does that, right? Well it appears that the person in question had too many relative females who are seated next to unknown men. Gee, and I thought on a plane everyone knew the other! Three hours later the guy and his infinite number of female relatives got off the plane and all the other passengers missed their connecting flights.

Hello? Paris?

To many people this is a curse, but to one particular person it was amusing. They inherited Paris Hilton’s number. Swell.

What People Do To Avoid Paying Tax

So tax is a big thing apparantly. Here in the Middle East we don’t worry about such things of course, since everything is overpriced by default anyway. However this Japanese woman thought of a brilliant idea: Use your relative’s names so that the government thinks your income is negligible and avoid tax. Thankfully her fine was only a margin of what she made out of her 60-year plot, which is amusing in and of itself.


What People Do To Avoid Paying Retail

It is a simple thing, really, when you don’t want to pay for an item. You just shoplift it, right? Experienced shoplifters (read: Brits) can live for years without any sort of income but live a high-end life with LCD HDTVs, a full supply of groceries and probably even borrowed children. What these shoplifter should teach the new generation is that, when you steal, please don’t go back to the store and ask for an exchange.

I Am Bored. Let’s Save A Shark!

You’re a bored lifeguard. You hear a commotion. Certainly, there must be a problem. Someone drowning. You run to the location and you see people frantically trying to escape a shark. What do you do? Save the shark!

  • The Observer

    Happy Monday man!

    Yes, I actually hate sundays! :S

    Nice briefs :)

  • The Observer

    Happy Monday man! Yes, I actually hate sundays! :S Nice briefs :)

  • amma15

    I don’t think KJ is a ‘briefs’ kind of guy

  • amma15

    I don’t think KJ is a ‘briefs’ kind of guy

  • KJ

    Observer – LoooL @ your use for “briefs”

    amma15 – Actually I am :P Hope you’re not disappointed heh heh heh

  • KJ

    Observer – LoooL @ your use for “briefs”amma15 – Actually I am :P Hope you’re not disappointed heh heh heh

  • Kinano

    May the gods of skies bombard your ridiculous being with sacrificed goats!

  • Kinano

    May the gods of skies bombard your ridiculous being with sacrificed goats!

  • KJ

    Do not mock the goats :P They have amazing bladders for voodoo

  • KJ

    Do not mock the goats :P They have amazing bladders for voodoo

  • Isam Abu Salhieh

    nice wrapped up “brief” of the craziness of this world :P

    peace

    can i hear more brief jokes coming LOOL

  • Isam Abu Salhieh

    nice wrapped up “brief” of the craziness of this world :Ppeacecan i hear more brief jokes coming LOOL

  • amma15

    Woahhh careful now…..I am a 23 year old frustrated and bitter virgin

    Just kidding about the frustrated and bitter part. On a more serious note though, until recently I worked in an upper-end and overpriced boutique and 75% of my job consisted of preventing shoplifting and other theft methods. We had like an embarassingly huge shoplifting problem.

    One time this woman urinated in the fitting room and came out to tell me that there was urine in the fitting room that has gotten on her pants and that she was disgusted and embarassed to walk out anywhere and that we need to give her something……….yea right lady do you really think I’m going to believe that

  • amma15

    Woahhh careful now…..I am a 23 year old frustrated and bitter virginJust kidding about the frustrated and bitter part. On a more serious note though, until recently I worked in an upper-end and overpriced boutique and 75% of my job consisted of preventing shoplifting and other theft methods. We had like an embarassingly huge shoplifting problem.One time this woman urinated in the fitting room and came out to tell me that there was urine in the fitting room that has gotten on her pants and that she was disgusted and embarassed to walk out anywhere and that we need to give her something……….yea right lady do you really think I’m going to believe that

  • KJ

    Isam – You’re so voodooed :P

    amma15 – LoooL, well I have to admit she is creative :P I hope you didn’t have to clean it up yourself.

  • KJ

    Isam – You’re so voodooed :Pamma15 – LoooL, well I have to admit she is creative :P I hope you didn’t have to clean it up yourself.

  • amma15

    mmaybe creative but stupid. It was so obvious it was her especially because she spent like an hour and a half going in and out of the fitting rooms making making it obvious she was up to something.

    Anyway, I just finished writing the intro series on my new blog. So what is the process to get you to list it on your site?

    Is there a contract? Do I need to sign an agreement? Any fees????

  • amma15

    mmaybe creative but stupid. It was so obvious it was her especially because she spent like an hour and a half going in and out of the fitting rooms making making it obvious she was up to something.Anyway, I just finished writing the intro series on my new blog. So what is the process to get you to list it on your site?Is there a contract? Do I need to sign an agreement? Any fees????

  • KJ

    amma15 – huh? what now!? *confused* bel 3arabi

  • KJ

    amma15 – huh? what now!? *confused* bel 3arabi

  • amma15

    bala habal ba3rif innak fhimt, I guess you think it’s funny to see my try to explain that in arabic

  • amma15

    bala habal ba3rif innak fhimt, I guess you think it’s funny to see my try to explain that in arabic

  • KJ

    amma – well too bad, no ads for you :P

  • KJ

    amma – well too bad, no ads for you :P

  • The Criticizer

    lmao! What have you been smoking? :P

  • The Criticizer

    lmao! What have you been smoking? :P

  • Ghasheema

    LOOL @ the shiekh

    if ur not so happy then buy ur own jet plane so ur women are “protected” :/

    nice post kj :)

  • Ghasheema

    LOOL @ the shiekhif ur not so happy then buy ur own jet plane so ur women are “protected” :/nice post kj :)

  • KJ

    Mac – Nothin dude, I’m a natural source of opium

    Ghasheema – Yeah I know right? How typical of them!

  • KJ

    Mac – Nothin dude, I’m a natural source of opiumGhasheema – Yeah I know right? How typical of them!

  • amma15

    So I guess that was a rejection……ma3lash baseeta

  • amma15

    So I guess that was a rejection……ma3lash baseeta

  • Elijah

    Imagine how good of a shop lifter you’d be if u actually got away with the exchange :)

  • Elijah

    Imagine how good of a shop lifter you’d be if u actually got away with the exchange :)

  • KJ

    Elijah – you seem to be talking from experience ;)

  • KJ

    Elijah – you seem to be talking from experience ;)